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The Bizarre World of Florida

Because when your sister makes you a penis-shaped cake, the only rational response is (BB) gunfire March 3, 2015

A Holly Hill man has been arrested after police say he shot his sister with a BB gun because she made him a phallic birthday cake.

TAFT--CHRISTOPHER-jpgChristopher Taft, 21, has been charged with aggravated battery and battery in the Sunday incident.

Police said Taft shot his sister in the buttocks with a BB gun in retaliation for his sister making him a birthday cake in the shape of a penis.

Taft told police he thought it would be funny to shoot his sister with a BB gun as a joke and did not intend to hurt her, according to the report.

The BB was embedded in the victim’s skin and she refused to be transported, saying she would go to a hospital herself, police said.

The victim told police she didn’t want to pursue

 

Sword swallowers invade beach

From London to Hollywood and even right here in Panama City Beach, sword swallowers stole the show.

StoryHarley Newman put on quite a show in front of Ripley’s Believe It Or Not Saturday afternoon to honor the ancient art of sword swallowing for World Sword Swallowers Day. Ripley’s brought back this tradition for the eighth year now and events like this happened all over the world Saturday and all at the exact same time at other Ripley’s locations.

Ripley’s was honored to have 3 sword swallowers, but swords weren’t the only feat performed. The crowd was awed as Newman performed many other death defying tricks to the excitement of a wide eyed crowd.

And get this; with the cold, windy weather Saturday, Newman said it’s actually harder to swallow a cold sword.

 

Thief steals guns, $18,000 in nickels during house party February 27, 2015

If you’ve seen someone carrying around $18,000 worth of nickels, police in North Naples, Florida, want to talk with you.

iStock_000051318116_Large_1424899413225_13944100_ver1.0_640_480Investigators said 183 boxes filled with bankrolls of nickels were stolen February 15 during a house party held in a gated community.

The five cent coins were stored in blue and white boxes that were the size of large bricks, Fox4Now reports.

About 360,000 nickels were stolen, weighing 3,968 pounds.

Police are asking local banks and businesses with coin-counting machines to report anyone who attempts to change an exceptionally large amount of nickels into larger bills, according to the Tampa Bay Business Journal.

Thieves also made off with a .12-gauge shotgun, a .45-caliber firearm and miscellaneous ammunition in addition to the nickels, CBS Miami reports.

 

$1200 worth of panties stolen in brief heist February 19, 2015

Police in Marion County are searching for a suspect who stole 75 panties worth $1,188 from a Victoria’s Secret store.

It happened on Feb. 9 at the store located in the Paddock Mall.

The Ocala Police Department said the man walked into the store carrying a gift bag and went to a display table and put the panties into the bag.

 

Jail mail soaked with drugs was a big ‘hit’ with inmates, feds say February 17, 2015

When the mail arrived at the Broward County jail, it looked like someone was putting in a lot of care and effort drawing cartoon characters and tattoo designs for a very special inmate.

There was more to those artistic postcards than met the eye: They were laced with a hallucinogenic drug that proved so popular behind bars that many inmates paid $10 for a “hit” — a tiny torn scrap of postcard to put in their mouths and absorb the synthetic drug, court records show.

Two inmates, Gregory Golden, 41, and Dean Aubol, 35, pleaded guilty Friday to federal charges of conspiring to possess and distribute the drug, known as 25I-NBOMe, which experts say has an effect similar to LSD.

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A third man, William Hahne, 56, has pleaded not guilty to the same federal charges and a related state charge of introducing contraband into the jail.

Federal prosecutors say Hahne made and mailed the drug-soaked cards to Aubol, and Aubol and Golden traded the drug with other inmates in exchange for cash or commissary items such as candy, snacks and other treats.

Jail officials did not know what was going on until August when an inmate at the Joseph V. Conte jail in Pompano Beach told law enforcement what he thought was LSD was being brought into the jail. The inmate said Hahne, who had been released from the jail several weeks earlier, was mailing Aubol envelopes containing postcard drawings laced with drugs.

“The contraband is then torn into tiny pieces (hits) and distributed throughout the jail by the inmates … The [informant] further advised that Golden was tearing approximately 250 pieces of paper laced with the hallucinogen and selling them inside the correctional facility for $10 apiece,” prosecutor Jodi Anton wrote in court records.

Golden’s girlfriend, who apparently was not charged, helped him send money by Western Union to Hahne, who then mailed the drugs to the jail, investigators wrote.

The inmate said he came forward because he saw an inmate “experience an extremely adverse reaction” after taking several hits of the paper.

Investigators put $60 in the informant’s commissary account to buy some of the drug and turn it over to them. The inmate said Golden told him to wait and another inmate delivered two pieces of paper within several minutes.

Investigators said they intercepted an envelope sent with a fake name from Hahne’s Miami apartment to Aubol at the jail. It contained a typewritten letter and a square piece of paper with a comic-style character drawing.

“I am thinking about getting the enclosed image tattooed on my upper arm … I’m imagining offering some guy who fits the bill a generous supply of 25 in exchange for his assistance,” the letter read.

The letter mentioned, in veiled terms, concerns about giving a second inmate a supply of drugs that might be viewed as competing with the jail’s existing salesman. The writer, who authorities say was Hahne, asked if the new supplier could get himself moved to a different jail housing unit.

The letter also discussed the possibility of setting up similar arrangements elsewhere in South Florida and in Washington, D.C.

“l am cash poor and 25 filthy rich,” the letter went on.

A day later, investigators said they intercepted a second envelope — this time with Hahne’s name and return address — containing a letter and a drawing of a pair of eyes.

“[The girlfriend] asked me to send him this picture she drew along with the message that the eyes of Texas are upon him,” that letter read. The drawing also tested positive for the drug, authorities said.

Hahne was unable to pick up at least some of the money sent by Golden’s girlfriend because of a misunderstanding about the code name they used. When police interviewed Golden’s girlfriend, she said she thought the papers were just inspirations for tattoo designs.

Hahne was arrested Aug. 27 after investigators went to his home and found several postcards from Aubol. Hahne told investigators he became friend with Golden in jail when Hahne was locked up for an April arrest for trafficking the drug.

Hahne once worked as a chemical engineer for Broward County until a series of drug-related arrests, starting in 2004 with a federal charge of manufacturing the drug Euphoria at his Fort Lauderdale home.

He is now undergoing psychiatric evaluation at the Federal Detention Center in downtown Miami.

His lawyer Glenn Kritzer wrote in court records that Hahne, who has a history of mental illness, was showing signs of possible confusion and did not appear to understand everything though he is “obviously an intelligent person.”

“He indicated that he believed that he was “working with the Government” while he was allegedly committing the crime,” Kritzer wrote. Prosecutors have said Hahne certainly was not working with authorities.

Aubol has been locked up in the Broward County Jail system since July 2013, facing several charges stemming from a carjacking in Fort Lauderdale. Golden has been jailed since December 2012 on charges he burglarized a Davie construction site.

They face a maximum of 20 years in federal prison and a $1 million fine when they are sentenced in April.

The series of drugs classified as NBOMes are a relatively new synthetic drug the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration declared illegal in November 2013. The drug is offered in several forms, including powders, liquids, laced into edible items and soaked into blotter paper, according to the DEA. Experts say it is potent, unsafe for human use and has been linked to several deaths in the U.S.

 

Penis Reduction Surgery Performed On Teen With Phallus Measuring 10 Inches Around (GRAPHIC) February 16, 2015

Surgeons in Florida have given a 17-year-old boy what’s being called the “world’s first” penis reduction surgery.

The teen came to doctors complaining of a penis “too large for intercourse,” according to an article in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, published online in November. He was also unable to play sports or even wear most clothing without his phallus showing through the fabric.

The penis was 7 inches long and had a circumference of 10 inches, according to the Daily Mail. That’s about the same size as an average mayonnaise jar, based on measurements taken by HuffPost Weird.

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“His penis had inflated like a balloon,” Rafael Carrion, a urologist at the University of South Florida who treated the patient, told the Daily Mail.

The shape and massive size of the penis was the result of the teen’s sickle cell anemia. Irregular blood cells would block penile blood vessels and lead to swelling and priapism — a long-lasting and painful erection. This had happened three times since the boy was 10, which “progressively led” to a deformed penis, according to the Journal.

Carrion said he couldn’t find any precedent for penis reduction surgery. His team ended up opting to slice along the patient’s circumcision scar, unwrap the skin, and then remove chunks of tissue from each side.

He added that the teen is “very satisfied” with his new penis, which is still “generous” in size but is now more standard in appearance.

 

Judge Issues Arrest Warrant For World’s Biggest Tom Brady Fan January 23, 2015

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A Florida judge today issued an arrest warrant for the world’s biggest Tom Brady fan.

Victor Thompson–who has a replica of Brady’s New England Patriots helmet tattooed across his skull–failed to appear today for a court hearing in connection with his arrest for felony narcotics possession. As a result, an arrest warrant was signed by a Circuit Court judge.

The 46-year-old Thompson also was a no-show at a January 8 court hearing, according to records.

Thompson, a New Hampshire native who relocated in 2014 to Florida, was arrested last September by St. Petersburg cops for trespassing and possession of the synthetic marijuana Spice, according to a police report. He was released on $1500 bond after jailers took a series of mug shots memorializing his tattoos.

Those photos, seen above, show that Thompson had his head inked to make it seem like he was wearing a blue Patriots helmet, complete with team logos, Brady’s number (12), and the word “Patriots.” Additionally, Thompson’s head includes other touches like an American flag, the NFL logo, and the brand name “Riddell,” which manufactures Brady’s actual helmet.

The back of Thompson’s head even contains a small green dot, which, on NFL helmets, indicates that the equipment is outfitted with an electronic device allowing its wearer to receive plays from the sideline. The dot is atop a tattoo of the Super Bowl trophy (which does not appear on Brady’s helmet).

Thompson was also arrested this month for Spice possession and carrying an open container of alcohol, both of which are listed as municipal ordinance violations in court records. On January 7, he pleaded no contest to the charges and was ordered to pay a $118 fine. The following day, he failed to appear in court on his earlier narcotics case.

 

 
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