The Bizarre World of Florida

​Neighbours Have Probably Seen You Naked says Study November 27, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 5:43 pm
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A recent study in the UK has revealed that one in three people have seen their neighbours naked through a window. The study revealed the situations people saw their neighbour in, including dancing, arguing, or simply relaxing naked.
6123076The study was conducted by web-blinds.com and 97 percent of adults that participated in the study said that they have seen their neighbours in awkward situations through their windows.

42 percent said they have seen a neighbour crying through their window while 70 percent said that they have seen their neighbours arguing.

31 percent said that they have seen a neighbour naked while only 8 percent said they have seen their neighbours having sex.

Only 27 percent agreed that they looked away when they spotted their neighbours in awkward situations and only 52 percent said that they got caught before looking at their neighbours in awkward situations.

According to a Web-Blind.com spokesperson, “It is clear from our study that many Britons are unintentionally inviting “nosy” neighbours into their homes to witness the most private and intimate events of their lives.

“Taking some time to re-evaluate the privacy of a home, and looking into how easy neighbours can see through some windows would help prevent embarrassing situations in the future.”


Are You Ballsy Enough To Enter A Testicle Beauty Contest? (NSFW)

If you’ve ever thought your balls look so good they should be immortalized, Brian Sloan has a proposition for you.

5653201c2100004a005ab687The sex toy entrepreneur behind The World’s Most Beautiful Vagina contest wants to prove he doesn’t discriminate among the genders with his beautiful balls contest.

“People always ask me, ‘How about men? Are you going to have a penis contest next?’ And I’ve told them, ‘F*** no. I’m having a balls contest,” he says in a promo video announcing the competition.

People who are gung-ho about being hung-low can join him in “celebrating scrotal beauty and diversity” by uploading photos of their balls to <ballscontest.com.

“The penis receives most of the attention when it comes to male genitalia and I thought a contest about the penis would be too predictable,”. “The scrotum, in many cases, comprises the bulk of the volume of the male genitals yet it is rarely discussed. Beauty standards for it are unknown.”

So don’t even think about sending a dick pic, perv. This is a balls contest, so leave the shaft photos for your Tinder matches.

Sloan decided against accepting images of the whole frank-and-beans combo after compiling the data from his vagina photo contest in a document called The Vulva Paper.

The analysis showed that the vaginas of women in “doggy style” positions were generally ranked higher. He determined this was due to the sexual nature of those photos. He thought having a shaft in the image could create the same effect, according to Maxim.

As for judging, the public will get to score each scrotum from one to ten stars, but nobody really has set definitive scrotal standards.

“I think larger looks better than smaller and a fuller bag looks nicer than an empty bag, meaning not only should the scrotum be large, but its volume should be mostly filled by the testicles. Additionally, the bag should have a good degree of dangle. When it comes to wrinkles, I prefer a smoother look, and hair-wise, some hair is ok as long as it does not totally obscure the view,”.

He also suggested good photo composition and lighting can improve a person’s odds of winning.

The person judged to have the best balls gets a cash prize, and Sloan will meet that person to take a 3-D scan of the boys, which he then plans to turn into items like paperweights, doorstops and bookends.

The name of this competition, the Autoblow Beautiful Balls Contest, is a nod to Sloan’s sex toy company. Autoblow sells motorized blow job simulation toys for men.

For the World’s Most Beautiful Vagina Contest, Sloan was seeking a vagina from which to mold his company’s newest sex toy. However, for this particular contest, Sloan will limit the replicas to novelty items, as he doesn’t think there will be much of a demand, Maxim reports.

The top prize is $5,000, with $3,000 for second place and $2,000 for third place.

As of the time of posting this piece, the contest had about 150 entrants, though only 124 of them had the requisite 200 votes to appear on the leaderboard.

Voting continues until December 25, which is also Christmas Day, which gives you plenty of time to select your favorite set of jingle balls.


Today’s WTF?? picture of the day …. September 13, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 4:27 pm



Teen Killed Masked Home Intruder Who Turned Out To Be His Father

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 4:25 pm
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John-HeislerIt was not until after 18-year-old Malachi Heisler shot the masked intruder that he recognized the tattoos on the man’s arms.

Malachi knew then that he had killed his own father. He wasn’t surprised. He always feared his estranged dad would come back.

“He wanted to scare us first,” Malachi said, “then kill us when we were afraid.”

According to Pinellas County sheriff’s reports, 46-year-old John Heisler crept into the yard at 5001 43rd Ave. N around midnight and smashed a window on the small gray house.

The sound drew his ex-girlfriend, Jolene Andrews, 37, and her boyfriend, Alton Pyles, 47, outside. They retreated when they saw a man clad in full tactical gear with a ski mask covering his face. They tried to shut the door, but he burst in, deputies said, grabbing Andrews and trying to force her to the ground with what looked like a gun.

Pyles called for help, deputies said, and Malachi opened his bedroom door.

“Just by the sound of the person’s voice, it was distress,” Malachi said. “And I knew it wasn’t a joke.”

At first, John Heisler had his weapon pointed at Andrews. He then trained it on Malachi, who had retrieved a rifle.

Malachi fired once, hitting his father in the upper body, investigators said.

The teen said early Tuesday that he thought the man had a pistol, but deputies later said Heisler only carried two BB guns.

No one else was hurt, including Malachi’s 13-year-old sister, Magenta, who was in a another bedroom.

“I kept that from happening,” Malachi said.

Malachi said the home invasion was “not something you prepare for,” but he had concerns that his estranged father might try something like this.

The family’s turmoil boiled over in recent months, according to court records.

Deputies responded to the house on April 22 for a domestic altercation. Once there, Andrews told them Heisler, who is also Magenta’s father, was moving out and had left three days before after a fight but returned suddenly that night. According to the report, Malachi told investigators he was “afraid” with his father in the house.

Part of the dispute concerned a safe in the home that contained several guns, including an assault rifle, two shotguns and semiautomatic pistols, as well as assorted ammunition, a deputy wrote. Heisler, a felon with a criminal record that dated to the late 1980s, was not allowed to have access to guns. Since he had a key to the gun safe, he was charged with illegal gun possession, records showed.

In early May, Andrews obtained a domestic violence injunction against Heisler that prohibited him from entering the house, Tyrone Middle School and Dixie Hollins High School, which the children attended, as well as Andrews’ workplace.

“He wasn’t a good dad. I’ll say that,” Malachi said.

When deputies first arrived Tuesday with “raised voices, canine units, (and) guns pointed at (him),” Malachi said he “felt like (he had) made the wrong decision.” Crime scene technicians had carried bags of evidence out of the house. A tow truck driver removed a white sedan from the driveway. But after hours of questioning, sheriff’s investigators brought the family back to the house Tuesday morning.

No charges had been filed.

Malachi eventually answered reporters’ knocks at his door and came outside. He wore a red bandana over his face, trying to block the smell of death he said lingered inside the home.

The teen said the incident might have been bloodier had he not grabbed a gun.

“If I didn’t, people would be dead, and more than one,” he said.


Man set fire to door in attempt to enter apartment

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 4:22 pm
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A Florida man was charged with arson of an occupied dwelling after he used a lighter to set fire to a door frame, Springfield police wrote in an arrest affidavit.

FireErick Deshaun Jones, II, was attempted to enter his sister’s apartment in the 1100 block of Transmitter Road, the affidavit states. The resulting fire caused a large portion of the door’s weather stripping to be damaged.

“It should be noted (the victim) lives in an eight unit apartment building and the other tenants of the building were placed in danger as a result of Mr. Jones malicious actions,” the affidavit states.

Jones confessed to setting the fire, officials added.


Elderly Woman Strips Young Woman Naked on Train

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 4:16 pm
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trainfight1An unnamed 64-year-old Chinese woman didn’t appreciate it when a 19-year-old woman refused to give up her seat on the subway. The incident occurred in a crowded, but not completely full car on the underground train. Video footage of the incident circulating on the internet shows the elderly woman lashing out at the younger woman and tearing off her shirt and bra in the process.

The two had been sitting in the same subway car in Wuhan, China, for about ten minutes before the incident occurred. The 64-year-old woman had a seat, but wanted the other woman’s seat because it had another open seat next to it. The sexagenarian was carrying a lot of bags with her and wanted to place them on the extra seat, rather than have them piled up on her lap and at her feet. The teenager responded that she shouldn’t have to give up her seat and made a disparaging remark about her elder’s physical appearance.

Absorbing the verbal abuse that she was ‘fat and weak,’ the elder of the two combatants decided to show the teenager just how wrong she was. She trainfight2proceeded to put the young woman in a headlock and tear her shirt and bra most of the way off. At this point, other passengers on the train got involved and tried to separate the two of them. Even with three people trying to pull the elderly woman off the verbally-abusive younger woman, she was still slapped, punched, and spit on. The confrontation continued until the next stop when authorities removed both women from the subway.

No charges were filed, but I assure you that the 19-year-old will think twice before giving one of her elders any more sass.


Naked Couple Wrestles in Street

Filed under: Uncategorized — floridaduh @ 4:11 pm
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The video footage of the incident begins midway through the fight, with the woman having already begun her attack on her husband. His black pants are around his ankles, while his shirt has been torn off completely. An addendum to the old adage from your mother that you should always wear clean underwear is that you probably shouldn’t be wearing a man thong if you think there’s any chance your pants might end up around your ankles in the middle of a busy street in broad daylight.

Quickly the man turns the tables and begins to abuse the woman by pulling her hair and slapping her in the face. All the while the two continue yelling at one another. Suddenly, in an effort to return the favor, the man grabs the woman’s green skirt and begins to tear it off her lower body. Not yet finished, he tears her blouse off, including her bra, leaving her breasts exposed. During the whole conflict, as they wrestle on the asphalt, people honk and look, but do not intervene.

Although the video does not show the conclusion of the argument, eyewitnesses stated that the wife was shouting at the husband that he was ‘useless’ while he countered that he was trying ‘to make life better.’ After about ten minutes, the two continued to argue with one another, but got into their red car and drove away, both only wearing their underwear.



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