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The Bizarre World of Florida

Nude dude tried to carjack man offering him clothes April 24, 2015

A man was arrested Tuesday afternoon after he was accused of trying to steal a car while naked from a man who offered him clothes.

hijacker

At 3:25 p.m., 32-year-old Ganzo Keith Haynes was in the buff and ambling along on the 2800 block Southwest 40th Avenue when he came upon a man beside a vehicle who offered him a chance to cover up. The man told Gainesville police officers he reached into his car for some clothing and Haynes grabbed his neck and began to choke him, according to a jail booking report.

Haynes told the man to get on the ground and hand over the keys to the car, according to the report. Haynes’ grip eventually forced the man down, and then he told him he no longer wanted the keys.

Haynes then ran away, and GPD officers eventually caught up with him. He told them he was naked because he had been drinking and that he grabbed the man in an attempt to get away after the man tried to unbuckle his own pants, the report states.

Haynes was arrested on a charge of carjacking and booked into the Alachua County jail, where he remained Wednesday awaiting a bond hearing.

 

Home burglar suspect stripped, spit and showered with hose April 23, 2015

Authorities continue to search for a suspected home burglar who stripped and showered with a garden hose in Cocoa.

635648729581659216-VerityThe incident started around 12:30 p.m. Thursday when Cocoa police say the man broke into a woman’s screened-in porch in the Quail Ridge subdivision in Cocoa, stealing a few of her belongings, according to FLORIDA TODAY.

As she confronted him, he apparently took off and headed toward Jason and Tommi Baker’s house, just a few doors down.

“I’m sitting in my garage working on stuff for my boat and this guy comes riding his bike in and crashes right inside my garage,” said Jason Baker.

“You would’ve thought he lived here,” said Tommi Baker. “He was just digging through stuff over there, taking my cigarettes. So, I grabbed my purse and had it in my arm.”

Along with the suspect stealing some of their belongings, the Bakers also caught him spitting on their floors before stripping down and taking a shower with their garden hose.

“He just walked on back and opened the door and turned on the spigot and was showering down,” said Tommi. “And I’m looking at my husband like, ‘What is this guy doing?'”

Police said as they arrived on the street, the suspect ran and stole clothes off of a clothesline.

They then chased him as he headed into a wooded area behind the Cocoa Commons shopping plaza on State Road 524.

Authorities established a perimeter and a K-9 was brought in, but due to heavy brush, they were unable to find the suspect.

A Cocoa police officer suffered a minor hand injury during the search.

Police have taken into custody Richard William Verity, 47, was apprehended at 1 p.m. on Friday.

He is charged with burglary to an occupied structure, resisting law enforcement officials without violence, burglary and theft.

 

Naked man yelled he was a god, had sex with tree April 16, 2015

A Florida man believed to be high on flakka, a drug that authorities say is sweeping the state, attacked a Brevard police officer after twice being shocked with a Taser while repeatedly saying he was God, according to officials.

weirdKenneth Crowder, 41, of Melbourne, was arrested Friday on charges of battery on a law enforcement officer, resisting with violence and assault with a deadly weapon on a law enforcement officer.

According to a Melbourne police report, Crowder was spotted by witnesses running naked through a Melbourne neighborhood, yelling that he was a god before committing a sexual act on a tree.

A Melbourne police officer went to the area and confronted Crowder, who was wearing blue jeans and a T-shirt, officials said.

Crowder walked toward the officer in an aggressive manner and identified himself as God, according to police.

The officer used a Taser on Crowder, but he pulled the probes out of his body and continued to fight, police said.  Crowder was shocked a second time, but he again pulled out the probes and went at the officer with clenched fists, according to police.

The officer punched Crowder in the face and a scrum ensued, with Crowder saying that he was Thor and trying to stab the officer with the officer’s badge, police said.

Other officers arrived and helped subdue Crowder, who was handcuffed and shackled, police said.

Flakka is the a variation of synthetic substances known as bath salts and delivers a cheap, powerful high while acting as an amphetamine, according to officials.  The drug can be snorted, smoked or taken by mouth and can cause violent behavior, officials said.

“We have spoken to some medical professionals here and they are starting to see an increase in its use (in Brevard County),” Melbourne police spokesman Dan Lynch said.  “It’s already in South Florida, and we think it’s coming here.”

Crowder, whose mugshot shows him with a black eye, was booked into the Brevard County Jail Complex. He later posted bond and was released.

In 2011, federal authorities banned a number of the chemicals used in bath salts. The active ingredient in flakka, however, has not yet been banned, authorities said.

 

Naked Man High On “Flakka” Ran Through Traffic To Escape Imaginary Killers April 13, 2015

matthewkenneyA Florida man who stripped off his clothes and ran through Fort Lauderdale traffic to escape imaginary killers hot on his heels was high on “flakka,” the synthetic drug that appears poised to supplant bath salts as the leading cause of hallucinatory havoc, cops report.

Following his apprehension, Matthew Kenney, 34, told police that after smoking the synthetic drug he began fleeing pursuers who had stolen his clothing and were intent on murdering him. Seen at right, Kenney explained that he would “rather die than be caught by these unknown people,” according to a Fort Lauderdale Police Department report.

Officers found Kenney–who was naked except for a pair of sneakers–running in traffic along Broward Boulevard early Saturday evening. Kenney explained that, “if I got hit by a car they would stop chasing me.”

Kenney, who was hospitalized for a psychiatric evaluation, has been arrested three times since December, according to Broward County court records. His recent rap sheet includes collars for disorderly conduct, assault, narcotics possession, and resisting arrest.

“Flakka,” which can be smoked, snorted, or injected, is an amphetamine that can sell for as little as five dollars per hit. But the high can come with side effects that include aggression, psychosis, and delirium.

The street drug has triggered a series of bizarre incidents in Florida, which appears to be the tip of the “flakka” spear. In Fort Lauderdale alone this year, a man high on the drug was arrested after trying to break down the door of the city’s police headquarters, while a second user impaled himself last month on a fence surrounding the headquarters.

Flakka, Florida, Bath Salts, Fort Lauderdale

 

‘Hot’ woman drives wearing nothing but her underwear April 11, 2015

An 18-year-old woman who was driving with no clothes on told Fort Pierce police it was “real, real, real, real, real, real hot.”

Ruffolo_Niomie_mugThe case began shortly before 11 p.m. March 20 as police spotted a Volkswagen on Seaway Drive traveling without the headlights on, an affidavit states.Investigators wound up throwing her in the cooler – the St. Lucie County jail – on a DUI charge after she took field sobriety exercises.

Police stopped the VW and spoke to the driver, Niomie Ruffolo, of Lake City. She was sweating, and her pupils were dilated.

“I noticed that she was not wearing any clothing,” the affidavit states.

Police asked her to get out of the VW, and she put on a sweatshirt.

“As she exited, I could tell that she was only wearing her underwear,” the affidavit states.

Ruffolo denied boozing or taking drugs.

Asked what was wrong with her headlights, Ruffolo said, “one light is out.”

“A Volkswagen is a German car … you just can’t find a dealership … you have to go to a Volkswagen type of dealership,” Ruffolo is quoted as saying. “Where’s one, in Gainesville, I don’t know.”

Police told her a Volkswagen dealership is in Fort Pierce on South U.S. 1.

When queried as to why her sweater was on inside out and backwards, Ruffolo said, “Because I’m in underwear and a bra, because it’s real, real, real, real, real, real hot.”

A specific temperature reading of “real, real, real, real, real, real hot” was not listed.

Ruffolo then said she no longer was hot. She had abrasions and an apparent black eye, and she said she was “jumped” the day before.

Ruffolo took field sobriety exercises and was jailed on a DUI charge.

Breath tests measured no alcohol in her blood, which police described as “not consistent with her level of impairment.”

Investigators got a urine sample for analysis.

It could be argued that Ruffolo may benefit from a “real, real, real, real, real, real” good lawyer.

 

Undies-clad women caused ruckus at McDonald’s drive-thru April 6, 2015

A 23-year-old woman wearing a bra and underwear was arrested on a DUI charge early Monday morning after creating a ruckus at a McDonald’s drive-through.

leesburgLydia Grace Kelm, a nurse, was at the drive-through on North 14th Street about two miles from the city’s police department around 3:30 a.m. revving her engine loudly and backing up twice, prompting the McDonald’s employee to yell twice to pull forward to the window, according to an arrest affidavit.

She “seemed to be confused, lethargic” and “had slurred speech,” according to the affidavit. Kelm told an officer she had three beers.

After giving her a jacket to wear on the chilly 48-degree morning, officers conducted a field-sobriety test, which she performed poorly.

A test later indicated that her alcohol content was three times the legal limit.

Kelm was booked into the Lake County Jail, where she has since bonded out.

 

Woman, 26, Removed Bikini Top in Café, Fondled Breasts, Tugged On Her Nipple Ring April 2, 2015

jgloverfloatMeet Jaclynn Glover.

The 26-year-old Floridian is locked up on a felony lewdness charge after she removed her bikini top in a beachside café and began groping her breasts in “a sexual nature” while also “tugging on her nipple ring,” cops allege.

Glover was on line at a Holmes Beach eatery Tuesday afternoon when she removed her bathing suit top and “exposed her bare breasts to all restaurant patrons,” according to a police report.

After walking around the café, the topless Glover sat down at a table, where she “again groped her breasts in a sexual nature,” according to witnesses who spoke with police. Glover, who is also known as Jaclynn Lussier, subsequently covered her breasts after being approached by restaurant workers.

jaclynngloverIn addition to a lewd and lascivious behavior count, Glover was charged with disorderly conduct, apparently because she was “being belligerent, using vulgar language and causing a disturbance by exposing her bare breasts.”

Glover, pictured above and at left, is being held in lieu of $7620 bond.

In a March 26 Facebook post, a bikini-clad Glover is seen poolside atop the shoulders of a male acquaintance. “Lol was deff havin alot of fun …and 3 bottles of wine later the pool didnt seem so cold,” she commented.

 

 
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