Hal Hamrick wanted to find a lady. So, the 48-year-old man did what ladies like. Hamrick walked around a Port St. Lucie shopping center exposing himself “multiple times,” according to an arrest affidavit. A witness told Port St. Lucie police he saw a man in a Miami Heat shirt and athletic shorts exposing himself. The man twice put his genitals out for view in front of Target, and once in front of Babies “R” Us. “Each time he attempted to use a trash receptacle as cover for the act,” an affidavit states. “Hamrick told police he was “exposing himself for the ladies.” “He wants to find a lady and they like when he does that,” an affidavit states. The guy’s got the angry masturbation face on lockdown in that mugshot.
Screw flowers, jewelry or cash. Hal Hamrick’s been on this Earth for 48 years and has learned what the ladies want. Cold hard dick. He figures they gotta at least see the goods before investing so why not cut out the middleman of dating and romance? Sure, he could have picked better spots to show off than Target and Babyies “R” Us, but true love knows no bounds One thing’s for damn sure, this guy’s got a permanent angry masturbation mug. I’m talking furious, spiteful, beating off feverishly when the woman isn’t home face. Best keep him away from the playgrounds.
Once Hal cheers up his defense should be that it just needed some air. Sometimes they need air, they can’t breath in there. It’s inhumane. People have been deemed innocent from a lot more for a lot less in the land of Florida.