floridaduh

The Bizarre World of Florida

When questioned after his arrest for rape of 10-year-old, man explains, “I’m not the normal guy that everyone thinks I am” April 23, 2014

Michael-HelmickA Marion County man has been arrested on capital sexual battery charges after deputies say he sexually assaulted a 10-year-old and said during his interview that he has an addiction that needs mental help.

Michael Helmick, 38, was charged by Marion County Sheriff’s Office on Monday with two counts of sexual battery after two inappropriate contact incidents with the 10-year-old victim.

While Helmick was being interviewed by deputies, he said, “I’m not the normal guy that everyone thinks I am,” according to the report, and said he has been accused and/or arrested five separate times on sexual based offenses.

During those accusations, Helmick said he has asked for mental help for several years and has not received it, deputies said.

Helmick also said that he has an addiction to adult pornography and dates females “much younger” than he is, according to the report.

Helmick was taken to Marion County Jail.

 

Police arrest two parents who beat up a bus driver because he didn’t let their kids off fast enough April 22, 2014

Two of the three suspects accused of attacking a West Palm Beach elementary school bus driver when he didn’t let children off fast enough were arrested Saturday, according to a Palm Beach County School District Police arrest report.

The driver, Joseph Beauzile, 40, of Boca Raton, told police he was approaching a stop on April 14 when the children from Westwood Elementary tried to rush off the bus. Since he wanted them in a single file, he stopped them, closed the door, and made them get in line.

fl-west-palm-bus-beating-20140421-001The delay was apparently too much for Shacaurra Burns, 25, of West Palm Beach. Beauzile said Burns forced her way onto the bus and pulled the emergency brake release, according to the report.

A student told police Beauzile closed the door and tried to lock Burns in as he called police, the report said.

But with Burns on the bus, a man later identified as Ryan Beckford, 33, of West Palm Beach, ripped the door open and started punching Beauzile, according to the report.

Another rider told police Burns got on the bus because she was in a rush while another told police one of the men, who remains at large, grabbed the bus keys and threw them outside.

fl-west-palm-bus-beating-20140421-002The investigator talked with a guidance counselor who helped identify the woman as Burns.

The police investigator watched surveillance video of the beating and said children on the bus began crying with “terrified looks on their faces” as one of the men held the driver down while the other repeatedly punched him.

The attack caused one student to jump out of a bus window, according to the report.

The investigator said he could hear Beauzile yelling at one of the suspects to give him back his keys in the video.

Police later showed Beauzile a photo lineup where he identified Beckford as one of his attackers.

Days after the attack, Beauzile told Sun Sentinel news partner CBS12 that he was still in pain.

He said the attackers hit him in his ribs, head and other places and said the attack has left him shaken.

“That’s why I think the school district has to do something about that because it’s not only me, it’s about the school, security of my kids, and my security,” he said.

Burns faces trespassing, battery and child abuse charges and is held in Palm Beach County Jail in lieu of $6,000 bail. Beckford is held on the same charges in lieu of $14,000 bail.

 

Pasta la vista, baby: Woman charged in pasta assault April 21, 2014

A woman described as a “crazy” acting “crackhead” got locked up after accusations she hurled pasta at a man, punched him in the mouth and busted a coffee cup, according to a recently released affidavit.

sfl-flduh-pasta-hurling-woman-20140418-001What could be called the case of the linguine launching lady began boiling late on April 5 as Port St. Lucie police went to an address in the 2400 block of Southeast Garden Terrace.

A man identified as the victim said he was expecting Jeri Rossello, 45, to drop by and get some of her stuff. She came in and walked to the kitchen. Rossello, he said, grabbed a pasta meal from the refrigerator and threw it at him.

Pasta is a general term for a variety of thin, dough-based foodstuffs of Italian origin sometimes served with meatballs. Available in a cornucopia of shapes and dimensions, pasta typically is rigid until boiled. It’s often served with a sauce, such as marinara, pesto, bolognese, alfredo or Fra Diavolo, with types of pasta including angel hair, linguine and elbow macaroni.

pasta2-thumb-500x366-15400Meanwhile, the victim said, Rossello smashed a coffee mug and pulled phone wires from the wall. He said she punched him in the mouth and took off in a U-Haul van.

He described Rossello as a “crack head” who acted “crazy,” telling police she may have gone to a different address where she’s staying with another dude.

Investigators eventually found Rossello, who said she tried some leftover linguine but put it back in the refrigerator. She said there was no physical or verbal altercation.

Asked about the victim’s injured lip, Rossello said he must have done that to himself.

Rossello, of the 1500 block of Southeast Balcourt Court in Port St. Lucie, was arrested on a misdemeanor battery charge.

 

“When police searched his car, they found condoms, the loaded handgun and a shovel and duct tape inside.” April 12, 2014

3489808_GA loaded handgun, shovel and duct tape were found in the car of a man Davie Police say was arrested for having sex with a 14-year-old girl.

Antonio Seisdedos, 36, was arrested Thursday on charges of engaging in a sexual act with a person under 16, computer pornography and child exploitation and traveling for computer pornography and child exploitation, according to a Davie Police arrest report.

Seisdedos was being held on $14,500 bond Friday, court records showed. No attorney was listed in court records. Efforts to get a comment from someone at Seisdedos’ address were unsuccessful.

According to the arrest report, the victim’s mother went to police after she found several text messages on the girl’s phone from Seisdedos. Seisdedos and the teen texted about having sex in the messages, which dated back to February, the report said.

When police spoke with the teen, she admitted to having oral sex with Seisdedos in his car, the report said. She told police she had been approached by Seisdedos outside a Publix, and he told her she was cute and asked if they could exchange phone numbers, the report said.

The girl said she told Seisdedos she was just 14, the report said. She also admitted to sending him naked photos of herself, the report said.

Using the teen’s phone, police contacted Seisdedos posing as the girl and arranged to meet with him. He didn’t show up for the first meeting but when he showed up to a second arranged meeting, he was taken into custody, the report said.

When police searched his car, they found condoms, the loaded handgun and a shovel and duct tape inside, the report said.

Seisdedos refused to speak with officers without his attorney, the report said.

 

Police get involved after dispute over too many pets gets physical April 11, 2014

sfl-flduh-neighbor-fight-furkids-20140410-001Some folks really show their claws when it comes to their fur kids.

Fur-real feud: A woman, identified as Christina M. Putman, 27, is accused of attacking her neighbor after the neighbor told authorities Putman was keeping eight dogs and several cats, reports TCPalm.com in Stuart.

After officials verified Putnam had more fur kids than the legal limit of five, Putman allegedly jumped her next-door neighbor’s fence and grabbed the woman’s hair, dragging her into the backyard from the porch, Port St. Lucie cops said.

 

When you just gotta go … to jail April 9, 2014

A spat over whether to pull into a rest area for a potty stop turned into a golf club beat down and a couple of arrests, according to recently released affidavits.

Florida Highway Patrol troopers were dispatched March 31 to the Port St. Lucie/Fort Pierce service plaza on Florida’s Turnpike for a report of a fight.

Colby Yandow, 23, told troopers he considers himself a female

despite what his driver’s license says. Yandow said he’s “a trans-gender individual who has completed his sexual reassignment surgery, but has not updated his driver’s license information to reflect such,” an affidavit states.

Yandow, who smelled of booze, told troopers that he and Kenneth Jackson, 35, live together in Orlando. He said he was driving north with Jackson, who also smelled of booze, when they quarreled about stopping at the service plaza for a bathroom break.

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YANDOW, ABOVE LEFT; JACKSON, ABOVE RIGHT

Yandow said Jackson punched him in the face and grabbed his wrist before snatching the wheel and forcing the vehicle into the service plaza.

Yandow said he got out and grabbed a golf club from the trunk. He said he hit Jackson in the head to protect himself.

Jackson said he told Yandow he needed to use the bathroom, but Yandow wouldn’t stop. Jackson said Yandow punched him in the face and pulled in the plaza. Jackson said he forced the vehicle into park so he could get out and use the toilet.

He said Yandow hit him in the head with the golf club, and then they scuffled.

“Mr. Jackson denied punching Mr. Yandow while he was driving, but admitted to punching him after being struck in the head with the golf club,” an affidavit states.

Records did not state whether Jackson got to use the bathroom.

Yandow, whose license is suspended and expired, was arrested on charges including aggravated battery, while Jackson was arrested on a battery charge.

 

Vampires, nudists, snakes: Nobody does wacky like Florida April 7, 2014

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By: Scott Maxwell

Last week, news broke that a congressional candidate in Gainesville had a secret pastime: impersonating vampires. And superheroes.

Some people would call this nutty.

In Florida, we just call it Tuesday.

Seriously, that’s not even our highest-profile vampire story. Remember the “vampire killings” from Lake County?

Some of our stories are heartbreakingly tragic. But so many are also mind-numbingly strange.

In Florida, we do weird the way Kansas does wheat.

Here, giant pet snakes escape. And breed. And then invade our national parks.

We have fish that eat people, alligators that eat people and people who eat people.

Two years ago, when news of the “cannibal attack” broke, the nation let out a collective gasp … until learning it was Miami. Then it all made sense.

We have killer amoebas, hanging chads and diaper-wearing astronauts. (All of which would make awesome rock-band names, by the way.)

We have a town named Christmas … where it never snows. We have the world’s smallest post office and a couple trying to build America’s largest house.

I used to think Florida attracted wacky people. Now I think it creates them.

Take my grandfather, for example.

Early in his life, he was a NASA engineer in Virginia — and as strait-laced and buttoned-down as they came. His passions were photography and crossword puzzles.

Then he moved to Florida. After Grandma died, we worried that our sober and contemplative grandfather would become listless and uninspired.

He became neither of those things. Instead, he became a nudist. (Lending more credence to the notion that it’s never the people you want to see naked at a nudist resort.)

At first, we were all: What the heck, Granddad?

But you know what? He found new life and inspiration. He’d travel down Interstate4 from Ormond Beach to Cypress Cove, where he’d pay strict adherence to the two main rules: Never take pictures, and always place a towel on the bar stool before you sit down.

Florida liberated him. And he spent the remaining, widowed years of his life happy. So you go, Granddad.

By the way, nudity is another one of our weird themes.

•”Nude man found dead on killer whale’s back”

•”Florida Lotto winner seeks to open a nude dude ranch”

•”Blind woman sues nudist colony over heavy dog”

Florida newspapers carry such headlines the way other papers carry horoscopes.

Some of that is understandable. It’s hot down here.

And I don’t mean happy, sand-at-your-toes, wind-in-your-hair hot. I mean sweaty-thighs-stuck-to-your-car-seats, armpit-stains-like-dinner-plates hot. It’s enough to make anyone nutty. And naked.

But it cuts both ways. When it’s hot, it makes us crazy. When it’s pleasant, we attract other states’ crazies. I mean, if it’s January and you’re already planning to run a scam, con or heist, would you rather do it in Buffalo or Boynton Beach?

This state is also lousy with newspapers and TV stations, meaning we have more ink-stained wretches and blow-dried broadcasters than your average state to tell all the weird stories.

Finally, there’s our melting-pot effect.

You simply can’t throw so many different cultures together and not expect some fireworks.

But you know what? That is also part of what makes this state so splendidly unique.

We have character and texture — a bouillabaisse of native and newcomer, sinner and saint, scholar and simpleton.

It’s a fusion that produces a weeklong bacchanalia in Key West and pioneering medical research at the Burnham Institute.

It’s the reason Orlando can turn out just as many people for a Veterans Day parade as it does for Come Out With Pride.

And it explains how a mild-mannered rocket engineer can feel inspired to start a new life by ditching his pocket protector — along with everything else he’s wearing.

And, yes, it’s also how we end up with some of the wackiest politicians in America — including a vampire-impersonating, superhero-mimicking, punk-rock lawyer running for Congress.

Just what we need … another lawyer in Congress.

 

Florida, where the prostitutes will choke you to death if you try to skip on paying April 4, 2014

A 19-year-old woman who was working as a prostitute choked a Lake Worth man to death after he tried to stiff her out of money he owed her for sexual services, deputies said.

sfl-escort-appears-in-court-to-face-murder-charge-20140403Andrea Alvira, of Lake Worth, killed Brandon Day, 22, in the early hours of Jan. 15 in a yard in the 5300 block of Rivermill Lane in Lake Worth, according to a Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office arrest report.

Alvira, who faces a charge of second-degree murder, told investigators a story they didn’t believe: that she had met Day in a nearby park and that he’d offered to give her a ride after a john had stood her up.

According to the arrest report, Alvira told investigators she attacked Day after he pushed her to the ground, raped her, and took off running after robbing her.

Detectives said there was no evidence to support her allegations against Day.

Instead, detectives determined that Day and Alvira had arranged to meet at the community clubhouse in the Rivermill development, and that Alvira would provide sexual services for a fee.

Detectives said Alvira did her part, but that Day tried to run away without paying her, the report stated. Alvira chased Day into a yard, where she dropped him by hitting him in the neck. She got on top of Day’s chest and forced her knees into his throat, suffocating him, detectives said.

Investigators looked at Alvira’s cell phone, which showed that she and Day had sent text messages to each other to arrange a meeting.

When deputies arrived at the scene, Alvira was “sitting in the grass next to the victim who was unresponsive and believed to be deceased,” the report said.

An investigation into the death ensued, with a medical examiner ruling on March 26 that Day’s death was a homicide.

Alvira was arrested Wednesday. She remained in the Palm Beach County Jail on Thursday, according to the Sheriff’s Office online booking blotter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

According to the arrest report, Alvira told investigators she attacked Day after he pushed her to the ground, raped her, and took off running after robbing her.

Detectives said there was no evidence to support her allegations against Day.

 

Man accused of trying to force his way into a maid’s Magic Kingdom inside a room at a Disney resort April 2, 2014

sky_-_4pm_tues_-_disney_ani_copy

“When I bring my family down here I try to keep my eyes and ears open. Just because we’re in Disney doesn’t mean anything,” visitor Joe Rossi said.

“I don’t think any place is safe this day and age. I think you always have to be careful,” another tourist, Nancy Sherrin, said.

Authorities said the suspect, described to be in his early 30s with a mole on the side of his face, fled out of the hotel room. Deputies said they’re not sure if the man was a guest and it’s unclear how he got onto the resort property

Investigators requested surveillance video from the resort, as well as a list of recent guests who stayed in the room where the attack happened.

“We do want people to take a close look at the composite sketch to see if they do recognize this person so we can bring him in,” Rodriguez said.

Disney officials released a statement regarding the hotel room attack:

“We are very focused on the well being of our cast member and have been working closely with the Orange County Sheriff’s Office to assist their investigation. We encourage anyone with information to contact the Sheriff’s Office. Providing a safe environment for our cast and guests is our highest priority. In addition to our own extensive security team (more than 1,000 security cast members), the OCSO has a presence on our property 24 hours a day.”

 

Teen buddies seeking massage for surfing injuries wind up in prostitution bust

Two teen tourists visiting an Osceola massage parlor last week found themselves in the midst of a prostitution bust, a dissatisfied client and angry practitioners of the ancient art of relaxation.

The 16-year-old buddies arrived at the Jasmine Massage Parlor on West U.S. Highway 192 shortly before 11 p.m. March 26 when undercover vice squad members also showed up, according to sheriff’s office arrest records.

“When I entered, the location was very busy and I was told to wait and would be very happy if I did,” the unidentified detective wrote. “During my time in the lobby area I overheard a young voice saying, “Stop! I don’t like that.”

Moment later, a young male quickly exited a door from the back of the massage parlor, closely followed by another young male.

2-suspects-jpg-20140402

“A female was running after them. She was upset and was yelling at the two males,” the report stated, identifying the woman as Lijun Shi, 51, formerly of China.

The detective described the teens as looking nervous when each gave her more money.

As the boys bolted, a client came out of another room, adjusting his clothing and yelling, “That was the worst” sex act ever and he had suffered an injury, the report stated.

Upon seeing the undercover waiting for a massage, the upset customer yelled a profanity and advised, “Go somewhere else.”

All of this happened as Shi and the partially clothed owner, Zhu Fang Liu, 54, formerly of China, stood in the lobby yelling. Meanwhile, the detective was sending a message to vice-squad members waiting outside to detain the teens, records stated.

“Liu then invited me into a room and directed me to remove my clothing,” the detective wrote about paying $70 for his massage and stating he was offered sexual pleasure for a good tip. “I told her I would do that but would come back later…I told the members what took place and we would move in after I was briefed on the young males.”

One of the teens told detectives the massage therapist asked him if he was attending school while talking sexy and grabbing at him. “He said he told her he did not like that” which was why he left the room in hurry followed by his friend, the report stated.

“He was offended and nervous that she grabbed him so he departed as well,” the detective wrote. “The boys told me that they have morals based on religion and what Shi and Liu did outraged them. This type of activity with young males has the potential to corrupt them.”

Shi was booked into the county jail in lieu of $4,000 bail on charges of living off the earnings of prostitution, assignation to commit prostitution and disorderly conduct.

Liu was booked into the jail in lieu of $2,000 bail on charges of living off the earnings of prostitution and two counts of keeping a house of ill fame.

The Orlando Sentinel is not identifying the two minors, who were out-of-state tourists and were not charged. They were released to their parents.

“They were dropped off by older family members. They claimed the day before they had done some sort of surfing exercise that injured their backs,” sheriff’s spokeswoman Twis Lizasuain said today. “They went to get a legitimate massage is what they told us. They didn’t realize that establishment offered additional services.”

The arrests were two of five made March 26 by the vice squad, which routinely focuses on a stretch of low-cost motels, restaurants and places of entertainment on West U.S. Highway 192 known as “The Strip.”

 

 
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