Down and dirty: Woman allegedly caught having sex in club bathroom May 6, 2013

FORT WALTON BEACH – The smell of dirty, public bathrooms must be a powerful aphrodisiac for some folks.

A woman who was caught having sex in the bathroom at a local nightspot tangled with Fort Walton Beach Police officers and now faces multiple charges.

According to an arrest report, 26-year-old Alicia Fawn Chessher was escorted outside the Block nightclub on Eglin Parkway after she was caught having sexual intercourse in the bathroom. As she was being escorted out by security, she allegedly struck one of the staff members and began swinging her fists at other staff members.

When police arrived she tried to start another fight with security employees, the officer wrote in the report. He noted she appeared to be highly intoxicated, with slurred speech, bloodshot and glassy eyes, dilated pupils, a red face, and a “staggered stance.” When an officer tried to intervene she struck him in the chest.

She was restrained on the ground but continued to kick and pull away from officers. She refused to enter a patrol car and resisted being put inside, and had to be physically put inside. Once there she tried to escape and had to be pepper-sprayed, the report indicated.

She was charged with disorderly intoxication, battery on a law enforcement officer, resisting arrest with violence, and resisting arrest without violence.

Mars rovers enter teen years, begin drawing penises on everything (with pics) April 24, 2013

Ah, kids. They’re born, they do some cute stuff and then they become obnoxious teenagers.

So goes for NASA technology, it appears. The twin Mars Exploration Rovers were launched nine years ago (they grow up so fast when they’re left to fend for themselves on a maybe desolate planet) for the purpose of learning more about the red planet. Like your average angsty teens, they have taken to drawing giant penises all over everything.

Florida victims’ rights pamphlet gives number to sex hotline March 28, 2013

LAKE COUNTY, Fla. -  Deputies in Lake County say a phone number written on a pamphlet given to domestic violence and sexual assault victims actually went to a sex hotline instead.

The victims’ rights pamphlet handed out by deputies offers an 800 number that connects callers to a recorded message that says, “Welcome to America’s hottest talk line. Ladies, to talk to interesting and exciting guys free, press 1 now. Guys, hot ladies are waiting to talk to you.”

“We’re giving out wrong information and I sure don’t want my victims calling a sex line,” said Kelly Smallridge, the Executive Director for the Haven, a victim’s advocacy group whose number was supposed to appear on the fliers.

Smallridge fears victims never reached the services they needed.

“I have a huge concern about it,” said Smallridge. “The sheriff’s office is passing this out. It’s on the Internet. That’s not our number, obviously, and I can’t figure out where it came from, so I definitely need to figure out how many police agencies around here have that number. Are all the brochures wrong?”

Lake County Sheriff’s Office Sgt. Jim Vachon said they print the numbers that they’re given and the same number has been printed on the fliers for years without any correction by Haven.

Nobody knew where it led victims, until Tuesday.

“We got a call from a victim we had given a pamphlet to and said that number was not going to the Haven,” said Vachon.

It’s unclear how the mix-up happened. The sheriff’s office called it a clerical error, but Smallridge said the Haven never had an 800 number.

“I can’t imagine anybody missed a resource that they needed,” said Vachon, who said the sheriff’s office has told deputies to stop handing out the fliers until it can print new ones with the proper information.

Vachon also said that a victim advocate at the sheriff’s office makes contact with every victim of violent crimes.

The correct 24-hour hotline to the Haven of Lake and Sumter Counties is 352-753-5800 for domestic violence, or 352-787-1379 for sexual assault.

Spring Break in Florida …… March 14, 2013

 

 

 

 

 

 

Car with lots of appeal sighted in Florida: Check out this Banana-mobile March 6, 2013

Doggie star search: Opera company seeking good pooch that can tolerate sustained loud notes February 6, 2013

Wanted: One good herding dog, medium to large size, preferably old, ragged and slow. Must be able to sit, stay and tolerate loud music.

And so they came Wednesday — straining at their leashes or waddling nonchalantly — to the Sarasota Opera House courtyard, with aspirations of being selected to star in the upcoming March production of “Of Mice and Men.”

At least one owner brought a glossy picture portfolio. A few looked more nervous than their charges. Most brought treats as a reward for the good behavior they hoped for.

It was the first animal audition the opera had ever held. And for all but one of the canine thespians — a veteran of an Asolo Repertory Theatre play — it was a first (and perhaps last) shot at stage time and stardom.

As with any audition, there were only a few minutes to make a winning impression. Each dog was led by their owner into a nearby rehearsal hall and made to sit between three singers, who proceeded to burst into the loudest section of the 20-minute scene in which the chosen dog will appear. Then a singer did the leading instead, generally with much less success.

Though the dog in the opera is shot, no simulated death throes were required. That part would happen off stage.

The adjudicators — Artistic Administrator Greg Truppiano and his assistant, Rob Holland — took notes while a cameraman filmed a video that would be sent to Michael Unger, the stage director of the production, in New York. The final selection is not expected for two weeks.

Thirteen-year-old Pede, a border collie mix, took it all in stride, barely perking his ears at the magnificent volume. Wrigley, a 3-year-old Australian Shepard, began to bark wildly in collaboration.

Ben, a giant St. Bernard/Standard poodle mix, cocked his furry head quizzically side to side and raised an eyebrow before standing up and politely walking out.

Four legs or two, not everyone is cut out for show biz.

THE DOGS

“Emma”: German Shepard, 4, owned by Diane Coles of Bradenton. “Does she sing? Sometimes, if she hears an ambulance.”

“Pede”: Border collie mix, 13, owned by Jean Smith of Arcadia. “He’s done herding, he’s been a 4-H dog, he’s been shown, he’s a therapy dog. He’s been around a lot. He’s used to a ruckus.”

“Cocoa”: Boouvier de Flandres, owned by Fonda Giacoia of Sarasota. “Our biggest problem is going to be getting her to look like she’s ready to die. She only does that when she’s sleeping.”

“Roscoe”: Chow/Shepard mix, 9, owned by Jim Gillespie. (Roscoe appeared in the Asolo’s production of ‘Two Gentlemen of Verona two years ago). “Yes, he has a resume. He beat out 45 other dogs for that part. He likes this environment.”

“Wrigley”: Miniature Australian shepard, 3, owned by Lauren Lee. “Is he calm? In all honesty, no. Not at all.”

“Ben”: St. Berdoodle (St. Bernard/Standard Poodle mix), 13 months, owned by Jeanine Brawn. “I know he’s not a herding dog, but people mistake him for an Old English Sheepdog, which is a herding dog.”

“Scot”: Border collie, 9, owned by Kathy Allen. “He actually is a sheep herding dog. He hasn’t been around singers, but he’s been around a whole lot of dogs, sheep and ducks.”

Flatulence, free thinking celebrated in Jensen Beach? December 24, 2012

What’s that smell? This Ford pick-up truck with its strategic message/license plate combo got my attention. It was parked December 12 at the Hoke Library in Jensen Beach.

♪ It’s the most apathetic time of the year ♪ December 10, 2012

Sometimes apathy turns to mild anger:

 

Statistically speaking, during the holiday season suicides spike (especially  among reindeer).

You’re sexually frustrated.

 

People don’t appreciate your unconventional approach to decorations…

…Or your hilarious take on yellow snow.

You can’t get anything right

You’ve tried half-assing your holiday decorations.

But there’s just no way to compete with your neighbors.

 

via

All that’s left to do is to wait for the shock of their December electric  bill.

Eight-foot-tall Festivus Pole goes up alongside Nativity scene. It’s made of PBR cans, natch December 8, 2012

Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus have graced the corner of Hillsboro Boulevard and Federal Highway every December for more than 20 years.

This year, they’re joined by an 8-foot-tall aluminum Festivus Pole, symbol of a Dec. 23 atheist “holiday” that became a pop culture hit after being featured in a “Seinfeld” episode.

“It’s just 23 beer cans stacked 8 feet high and conveniently located 6 feet from Baby Jesus,” said activist blogger Chaz Stevens, who installed it Thursday with the city’s permission.

Stevens said he has been trying unsuccessfully for five years to get the city to take down the Nativity scene. So this year he asked for space to express his own unreligious beliefs.

“Think of how many people have died over the years to give us our freedoms,” Stevens said. “So I’ve got to push back a little.”

City Attorney Andrew Maroudis declined to comment.

But Marc Rohr, a law professor at Nova Southeastern University called the display an unusual move. “I think the atheists of the world are more interested in preventing religious displays than in joining them.”

What a name! Jackmeoff Mudd Arrested In Fort Lauderdale August 19, 2012

A South Florida man with an unfortunate name — or a strong commitment to pranking police — was arrested last Friday on a litany of charges in Fort Lauderdale.

Jackmeoff Mudd, 54, was arrested on charges of assault, disorderly conduct, resisting an officer, possession of alcohol in an open container, and violation of probation.

He is being held at a Broward County jail on a $300 bond, which means that at some point in the last few days, a somber county judge read his name aloud in court (here’s hoping it was Judge John Hurley, just to bring his week full circle).

Mudd is not the first jailbird to have a strange name, of course. In Wisconsin, police booked Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop for multiple charges, and on the flip side, a woman who tried to stop three brothers from robbing a Texas WalMart last year turned out to be named Monique Lawless.