Despite saying she was a “stripper” and had not taken painkillers in more than 114 years, a Palm Bay woman could not avoid a trip to jail, according to a recently released arrest affidavit.
Another deputy stopped the vehicle, which Woodberry was driving. She smelled of booze. When asked for her registration, Woodberry handed over the vehicle title four times.The case against Devin Woodberry, 34, began around 2:40 a.m. Oct. 5 on Okeechobee Road in Fort Pierce when a vehicle nearly struck a St. Lucie County Sheriff’s deputy while the deputy was on a traffic stop.
A deputy spotted a prescription bottle of the painkiller hydrocodone in Woodberry’s purse. She said she took the medication three days earlier, later saying she used it on that day “a million hours ago.”
“A million hours” is about 41,666 days, which is about 114 years, which would mean Woodberry used the hydrocodone in about 1900, which is about 79 years before she was born.
Meanwhile, Woodberry said she drank two Bahama momma wine coolers.
Woodberry agreed to perform field sobriety exercises, one of which is known as the “one-legged stand.”
She was able to maintain the position for about 15 seconds, “and boasted the task was easy, self proclaiming, ‘I’m a stripper,’” the affidavit states.
Some might find validity in Woodberry’s apparent logic that strippers — scantily clad or nude women who perform erotic dances involving bending and contorting — should be able to do the one-legged stand with ease.
But according to the affidavit, Woodberry didn’t keep one of her legs straight. She also used her arms for balance.
Investigators found two empty liquor bottles under the passenger seat of Woodberry’s vehicle.
Woodberry, of Palm Bay, was arrested on a DUI charge, and taken to the St. Lucie County jail.
Breath tests measured Woodberry’s blood alcohol content at 0.194 and 0.193 — more than twice the legal limit of 0.08.